Tuesday, August 26, 2008

So much to say

There is so much to talk about since last week. Addie and I really enjoyed being back home with the family, but we missed Zac like crazy! I don't think I realized just how much I missed him until I got back to CR and saw him..anyways..

It was good to get a chance to introduce Addie to everyone from both my family and Zac's. Of course, everyone just loved her to pieces and thought she was just precious! I'll get pictures posted soon! Addie is a little off her routine (if she really had one) and so the last couple of days I've been trying to get her back onto a routine....we'll see how that turns out! But overall the trip home was great and we're actually headed back this weekend for the holiday and Zac is joining us, so it will be good.

Couple of things on my mind tonight.....Addie has outgrown her newborn sleepers. I am sad but excited at the same time. She has also moved out of the newborn diapers as well....It is sad for me to put away those sleepers that I fell in love with her in while we had our sleepless nights in the NICU, but it is good to pack them away knowing that it just means she is growing and we'll keep them for the next one!

Last night at our bible study we discussed where we feel God working in our lives right now. All through my pregnancy I memorized and recited multiple times a day a verse from Phillipeans. Rejoice in the Lord your God, I say it again Rejoice! Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving present your requests to God and the peace of God that transends understanding will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus. This verse kept me "saine" during the pregnancy. The re-occuring thoughts that something was wrong with the baby would have probably driven me into a crazy person if it wasn't for that verse. Anytime those thoughts were taking over me I could recite this verse and God would give me that peace. I know now that those thoughts were somewhat of a motherly instinct and God was preparring me for the baby that I carried truly having Down Syndrome. I never wanted to entertain those thoughts, but I now know God was preparring me during those times.
Since Addie was born I have continued to use this verse to keep my anxiety at bay. With all of the doctors appointments and therapists to work with it could be easy for us to get overwhelmed. I really feel God has given me that peace that transends understanding. He has given me peace in dealing with all of the appointments, but especially when it comes to Addie's surgery. For those that know me, I am usually a huge worry wart. Even when everything is going great, I will always find something to worry about. However, when it comes to Addie, her heart, and her health, God has given me peace. I know the months ahead aren't going to be easy, but I do now that we will be traveling the road with God at our side. I think of the footprints poem, and I know it will be over the next few months as we prepare and go through Addie's surgery, I know that it will be then that God will be carrying us. He will give us the strenth, the patience, and the peace that we need. I just know it. I don't now how and I don't know why, but I just do. This is how God is working in my life today and I am so blessed!

Well, Addie is asleep on my chest, I should get her to bed as well as myself. Tomorrow I'll be home most of the day so I'll be able to get the buddy walk info out as well as some pictures from last week! Gnight!

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